Pronounciation
by RandomSelection
Summary: When, many years later, former Hogwarts-students would tell the story of 'that' day to their grandchildren, they’d always start with, “If I hadn’t witnessed it myself, I’d never have believed it …” Curious? Marauders' Era


Pronunciation My thanks go to Siriusly Klutzy for beta-ing this nonsense! And if some of you should be waiting for the next chapter of 'Siriusly in Love' ... so am I! (There's just no time at the moment – but I'm trying!) In the meantime, I hope you've fun with this little oneshot! Please review!Pronunciation

When, many years later, old men or women, former students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, would tell the story of _that day_ to their grandchildren, they'd always start with, "If I hadn't witnessed it myself, I'd never have believed it …" They'd shake their heads and smile reminiscently. "You know, it seemed to be a completely normal day, until something unbelievable happened. Sirius Black …" And then they'd start to chuckle and almost forget the children sitting in their laps, lost in thoughts and memories … but since we don't have the patience to wait for them coming back to reality, we'll just tell the story ourselves. The most remarkable story of _that day_, when Sirius Black … but sit back and listen for yourself:

It was a quiet afternoon in the Gryffindor Common Room. People were reading or doing homework, some were playing wizards-chess or cards. At a table in a corner sat Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, and Frank Longbottom, hardly visible behind huge piles of books, for they were doing research for a particularly important essay in Muggle Studies about the _Principles of British Foreign Policy_. At a safe distance, Sirius Black was lying lazily in an armchair and entertaining himself by throwing bits of parchment at his friends, which they valiantly ignored. Problem was that James was off somewhere doing 'head-duties' with Lily (_Right! _Sirius snorted inwardly_. Head-duties! Sticking their tongues down each others throats, more likely!_), and Sirius was bored (and everyone knows where _that_ leads to…).

He had of course told Remus that he was bored, more than once – about twelve or fourteen times, in fact! – he had told Peter, Frank, and even Alice and Dorcas, who had passed by some time ago (each of them about twelve or fourteen times, as well!), but he had discovered that Moony's ability to ignore him had reached a completely new level of perfection, and, even worse, it seemed to be contagious – everybody was ignoring him now!

He was just contemplating what to do now (Tell them again, maybe?), when he heard Remus say something that instantly made him focus his whole attention on his friend. "What did you just say, Moony?"

Remus was completely surprised. "What?"

"What were you just talking about?"

Remus gave him a strange look. "I was explaining this basic principle of British foreign policy…"

"Yeah, exactly! Tell me about it!"

Now, not only Remus, but Frank and Peter as well were staring at him, open mouthed. Sirius Black showing interest in something that had to do with school-work? Voluntarily? Impossible!

Remus started to laugh. "Well done, Padfoot! Almost got me there!" But he stopped laughing when he saw his friend's expression of rapt attention. "You're pulling my leg, right?"

The whole common-room was listening now. People closed their books and dropped their quills, the chess-players lost interest in the constellation of their pieces, and even the figures themselves stopped glaring at each other and turned round to watch, for something much more interesting was going on now, something completely unheard off, something everybody present was absolutely positive they'd tell their children and grand-children about: "I was present the day when Sirius Black showed interest in school-stuff!"

"No, I'm serious!" He didn't even seem to notice the opportunity for his favorite pun. "Tell me!"

"But you don't even take Muggle Studies!"

"Does that matter, Moony? This is much, _much_ more important!"

Now Remus Lupin started to get a little worried. "Padfoot …" he say slowly, searching for the right words, "are you sure you're all right?"

"Of course I am! But will you please tell me, Moony? Please!"

"Okay, okay, I will tell you! But please explain to me _why_ this is so important to you!"

"Isn't that obvious? There are so many things I've to think about: There's Quiddich … there's your _furry little problem_ … there's pranking the Slytherins … and there of course is my reputation with the girls I've to take care of …" He stopped with an expression as if this explained everything.

Remus just stared, completely and utterly confused. What the had all this to do with British policy? He half had in mind to take his friend to the hospital wing, but he knew quite well that Sirius wouldn't want to come … "Okaaay", he said, even more slowly. "I get that you've got a lot of things on your mind … but how …?"

"Really, Moony, sometimes you are unbelievably thick! The greatest problem is to coordinate the demands of the girls with all the other stuff, and this principle of yours could …"

But Sirius Black did never finish that sentence. He never got the possibility, because in exactly this moment yet another completely unbelievable thing happened. Remus Lupin, quiet, controlled Remus Lupin, master of the silent chuckle, started roaring with laughter! Everybody jumped and stared at him in disbelieve. He was holding his stomach and laughing so hard that tears were running down his face. Everybody could see that he was in trying to restrain himself, but was struggling in vain.

Sirius was as confused as anybody. "What…?" But his words were drowned in another explosion of laughter. Now Remus had lost his balance and was literally rolling round the floor, thrown from one fit into another.

It took a long time until he, still shaking, managed to get himself up, and even longer before he was able to form words. "Oh, Padfoot!" he managed to get out – and started laughing again.

"What?" Now Sirius started to get a little angry. "What's so funny?" But that question only got him another fit of laughter from Remus.

After a while, he calmed down, took some long, deep breaths. "You know, Sirius", he said, and the corners of his mouth started twitching again, "It's 'Checks and Balances', not _chicks_!"


End file.
